A pot of tea, A pot of coffee

Just read through the Taiwan Triad epic tale. It's really amazing and exciting. I love amazing and exciting. It's just a matter of making everything into an epic tale, amazing and exciting.

I'm still devastated about the class. There cannot be any sympathy. As Beau said, it's not like I'm the first person to ever not make a B on a class which requires such a thing to pass. I still can't help but be totally pissed at myself for not doing better.

The coolness of the house is freezing the inside of my ears, which I just washed along with my face and neck. It seems that "washing" during the winter for me is going to consist of a nice little routine, which I have never had. Soak my wash cloth in very hot water, then putting a splash of the cvs brand toner (which turns out to cool the whole thing down a lot). Scrub my face a bit til it's nice and warm, clean the ears, and neck. Then, take my delicious shea butter petroleum jelly (generic is so good to me) and rub it between my hands til it's warm, then pat it all over my face, a light layer, around my eyes, and then rub it up my neck, ear lobes (ok I don't have "lobes", but the thing that would be a flappy part). Then I take that wash cloth and soak it again in nice hot water and dab that all over my face, just enough so my face doesn't have that sheen of petroleum jelly all over it. Then I put my spf moisturizer for sensitive skin on. And I feel refreshed and it's fast and I like it and my acne has all but disappeared. Also, because of the nasty cavity I can't comfortably eat sugar, and it's getting to be stronger pain that lasts longer if I do venture to eat the stuff. Ice cream isn't even pleasurable anymore- sweet AND cold is a killer.. CINNABUN BEN AND JERRY!

Agh. I'm still putting honey in my tea, but that scoop of ice cream in the watered down coffee will have to be abandoned.

It's almost 10am. I am going to finish my drink, do some stretches, wrap myself up as tightly as possible, grab my ear pods and head to the lab. With the hopes that I will not be bothered by anyone all day. No external distractions to amplify the internal ones. I just want to be done.

And just for some relaxation. Or something...

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

Steve Jobs